Concert experience

The stage lights having seizures

Bass cranked so high my chest is numb

Hands up

Swirling clouds escape from the people in front of me

As the music pounds

The dark night sky is cracked

With the sound of cheers

Skin on fire

Hair whipping

The energy blares

Electricity hangs low in the air

And even though it’s night

The air is thick and humid

I lose a shoe

But this moment is making me too careless to pick it up

Pounding bass

Pounding heart

And the lights go down

It’s all over

Until next time

Responding to Classmate work

I read Harlyn’s an Emily’s I have seen poems. Both girls did a really good job using describing the feeling that each of their abstract nouns portrays.  Harlyn’s was very powerful because, like I said, her sensory detail was really awesome and she also didn’t use cliche ideas.I think her’s is about hate or war because it talks about so much destruction and hatred in the world we live in today. For example, when she says “I have watched the fiery power of pounding fists trying to break the peace and send the Earth into chaos. Emily’s poem was really good because she personifies inanimate things. For example, when she says “ whole world stops for a moment and sighs in relief”  I think this means that the world is taking a moment and realizing that upon it are so many good things. I was wondering what Emily’s was for a long time but I think that it’s peace. There was lots of good alliteration in both but it wasn't overkill.  Emily and Harlyn's poems were both really mature sounding because there weren't tons of rhymes/internal rhymes. They used powerful words and both ladies included lots of meanings in their poem that could be interpreted differently. Both girls did a good job with the I have seen first lines and changed them to something that no one else was doing so they were more interesting to read. I liked the way their poems flowed. Sometimes that entire poem can be ruined by the rhythm if it isn’t right and both girls were spot on. Well done babes! :)

Poetry response #4

Be Glad Your Nose is on Your Face

By Jack  Prelutsky

                                                                                                 

Be Glad Your Nose is on Your Face

not pasted on some other place,
for if it were where it is not,
you might dislike your nose a lot.

Imagine if your precious nose
were sandwiched in between your toes,
that clearly would not be a treat,
for you'd be forced to smell your feet.

Your nose would be a source of dread
were it attached atop your head,
it soon would drive you to despair,
forever tickled by your hair.

Within your ear, your nose would be
an absolute catastrophe,
for when you were obliged to sneeze,
your brain would rattle from the breeze.

Your nose, instead, through thick and thin,
remains between your eyes and chin,
not pasted on some other place--
be glad your nose is on your face!

By Jack Prelutsky

                                                                                                               

This poem is really silly it reminds me of 4th grade when Mrs. Beadle read it to us. The rhyme scheme is ABABAB..for example “Within your ear, your nose would be
an absolute catastrophe!” Some of the descriptions in the poem are weird and make you think of other things like when Prelutsky says “Imagine if your precious nose, were sandwiched in between your toes” this reminds me of like a moldy sandwich or something and that sounds gross and makes the reader cringe.  There is a cliche alliteration when he says “through thick and thin” because this is used in a lot of poems I’ve read. I think this poem is directed at kids because it seems more childish because of the wording and how the words would be more understandable for young kids. I think this is a cute poem and everyone who likes poets like Shel Silverstein or has a sense of humor would like these poems.

Braggin' Rap

My name is Alyssa
Everyone can hate
But are you so dope that you're illegal in your state?

I know I am
So fresh I don't need soap
If you think you're cooler
I'll answer that with nope

I'm better than you at spitten' a rhyme
So don't keep starin', you're wastin' my time
Keep doin what you're doin'
Bummin' about
I'm done with this and now I'm out

Limericks

There once was a boy named Logan

Who was a wizard that made dangerous potions

One day he tried ‘em

And they bubbled inside him

And now he needs rash cream and lotion

There once was a girl named Poa

Who had a really slithery boa

One day he got lost

And at a pricey cost

‘Cause now we can’t find Noa!

There once was a Chum named Wi

Who drank all the water that she could see

One day she drank too much

Clenched her legs and such

But wasn’t able to hold back the pee

Poem response 2

I personally think this poem is really a sweet way to explain going to sleep. The little Sandman comes and sprinkles his dust and sand and it makes everyone fall asleep. I liked the descriptions the poet used to describe the things that are happening like “the rosy clouds” meaning the sunset or the metaphor used where the eyes closing were compared to roses closing. A verse that gets repeated “Blue eyes, gray eyes, black eyes, and brown” was funny because they forgot green eyes. I remember watching March of the Wooden Soldiers when I was little and remembering the Sandman and having my parents explain his legend. I guess he used to be more known back in their day...Anyway I think that it’s cool to have legends and stories to tell about how things “happen” and I think it’s cool how the poet put the tale in poem form. It’s shorter and easier to read.

Poem response #3

Roald Dahl is one of my favorite poets ever. He is very silly and this poems are in story form so it has it’s cool. The rhyme scheme is couplets. Some examples include: “And when he finished, Pig, of course, Felt absolutely no remorse.” Or: “He ate him up from head to toe, Chewing the pieces nice and slow.” The poem itself has some good messages, in a weird way. Like when the Pig realizes that he has to conquer his problems before they can get to him. This is something that you can apply to real life situations, but the thing to to is not expect the worst, like Pig did . Maybe when t the farmer wasn’t coming to kill pig, he just thought the worst and acted in a way that he might not have needed to act. When Pig is talking, he begins most of his sentences with “they” which is repetition. The rhyming scheme is AABBCC and so on. This kind of rhyming is the easiest to see because the ending line rhymes have the same end sound. I thought this was a good and creative poem and I liked how the poet used the pig as the main character so you could see how he felt about everything. I also like how there was some imagery with words that are kind of icky like “grizzly bit.” The “grizzly bit in this case though was part of the story; “Now comes the rather grizzly bit. So let's not make too much of it” This relates to sometimes when you’re eating meat that you can get some grizzle in your mouth which is like a chewy gross part that is kind of indescribable. It’s like a play on words.